January
the cure for obesity.
This morning, around 9:15 am, someone very close to us in our family passed away. She was 36 years old. Her son is 4. Her daughter is 10. I want to tell you a little bit about her story, but in order to protect her privacy as well as the family and her children, I’ll call her Amanda.
A little over 4 years ago, Amanda weighed 345 lbs at 5’3”. She decided to have gastric bypass. It slipped past the doctors that she was pregnant, so when she had the surgery, she was a month pregnant with “Jay”. They told us that he wouldn’t survive the pregnancy, and if he did, he would be severely disabled or severely retarded. He did survive the pregnancy, and he is a very healthy, wonderful 4 year old boy. He doesn’t have a disability of any kind and is actually at a 7 or 8 year old level in most areas of his development.
After the surgery, she lost some weight rather quickly, though it tapered off after she had Jay. She found ways to “sneak” around the surgery and would still eat foods that were restricted. After so long, she replaced her addiction to food to an addiction to alcohol. She never truly dealt with the reasons why she was so obese and chose to smother the feelings with another device.
She had been drinking since about 2 ½ years ago. Because of the surgery, her stomach didn’t digest the alcohol the way mine or yours would. The alcohol went straight to her liver, and in a very short time, it was pickled. Within 2 years, she developed cirrhosis of the liver. When she found out she was sick, she quit drinking, but it was too late to save her health.
You see, it wasn’t that the surgery didn’t work. It’s just she didn’t ever deal with the symptoms. She had been through so much, and it was easy to understand how she would want to cover feelings. But it ended up costing her life.
I don’t mean to sound like I’m blaming the gastric. By all means, I am not. It’s an excellent tool that when used as a last resort saves many people’s lives. It’s just she didn’t do the therapy needed with it to deal with the real problems that lay beneath her addiction. She was a wonderful person. We had a lot of good times together, and it breaks my heart that she is now gone.
So I beg you. As you journey on your weight loss road, don’t just go through the motions. Diet and exercise are great, but that is just the tip of the iceberg. Go through the Emotions. Really examine your life and your heart and figure how you got to that point in the first place. Otherwise, it will be far easier to revert to that old lifestyle or choose another means of masking the real issues. Sometimes it’s ugly and messy, but you are worth overcoming it. I will be doing more posts like this, talking about how I realized the reasons why I was fat, though I’ve blogged about it in the past. Each of you mean a lot to me, and I want to see you beat this, as I want to see myself beat it as well. We will overcome the problem, not just the symptoms. God bless.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Oprah did a whole show once about how gastric bypass success stories often just replace their eating addiction with a new one. And you are so right. I once heard the expression – It’s not what we are eating but what is eating US.
You are so right. I know that on my journey to lose weight I really have to look for my “triggers.” Why do I want to eat everything in sight? Usually it’s because I’m angry…a past emotion from a past experience that just makes me turn into an eating monster. Thanks for this post, it makes me remember to listen to my body.